


Perfect Imperfections

by Mouse (6229glambert)



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: Desire, Friendship, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-16
Updated: 2014-10-16
Packaged: 2018-02-21 11:08:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2466077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/6229glambert/pseuds/Mouse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>.... If only he had known that Adam was actually seeing this guy, he wouldn’t have approached him like this. What was he even thinking? ....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Perfect Imperfections

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a long time ago, with the intention of writing something bigger around it ... But I got a total writer's block on it. So I decided to just post this as a one-shot.

Typically, even on Adam’s days off now that the tour had been over for a while, he would be up early. He was just enjoying his morning cup of coffee as the doorbell rang. Without even wondering who it could’ve been, he put his coffee down on the table and went for the door. To his big surprise, it was Tommy. 

“Umm... Hi,” Was all he could really say. He wondered what he was doing at his place, especially at this time in the morning. Tommy was more the type to be at anyone’s door in the middle of the night, not exactly the early morning.

Tommy inspected Adam from head to toe. As he saw Adam standing there in his black, sparkly, silky, typically Adam bathrobe, he knew exactly what he had longed for. And without any further thoughts, Tommy firmly cupped Adam’s face with both hands and kissed him deeply, right on the lips. Adam was stiffened from shock. Sure they had kissed before, on stage, for show. But what the heck was this? His brain flooded with questions in a matter of seconds. He simply couldn’t comprehend what was happening, except for the fact that he kinda liked it. Even if it was just a little bit, he couldn’t lie to himself.

“Baby, who is at the door?” 

That’s what made Adam snap back to reality. He instantly pulled away from Tommy and scratched the back of his head nervously. “It… it’s just Tommy,” He muttered as he looked at him from the corner of his eye. “Remember… Sauli? Sauli… Tommy.” 

“Sauli…” Tommy repeated, in a slightly disappointed tone. He felt so stupid at this point. If only he had known that Adam was actually seeing this guy, he wouldn’t have approached him like this. What was he even thinking?

Sauli then came up beside Adam, got up on his tippy-toes and kissed him on his temple. “Good morning,” He whispered to him. He then turned towards Tommy and went in for a hug. “Nice to see you again.” Tommy just felt so awkward. And dumb, definitely the dumb part was overwhelming him.

He put on a fake smile and hugged Sauli back. “Yeah, you too man.” He replied, trying to sound as honest as he possibly could. Sauli was a good guy, but at this point Tommy was just so distracted by how stupid he found himself. He was also kinda surprised about how crushed he actually was from finding out that Adam now officially had a boyfriend. Despite the fact of who it was. That part didn't even matter, really.

“Tommy, why don’t you come in and join us for breakfast?” Sauli offered in a very polite tone. He was indeed such a genuinely nice guy. But after what had just happened, Tommy definitely wasn’t planning on doing so. This had become way too awkward for his and Adam’s liking.

“I’m fine, really,” Tommy said, to Adam’s great relief.

“No,” Sauli stated. “Come on in, have a cup of coffee with us at least. I shall be leaving soon though, I have a photo shoot to do.” 

Adam didn’t even bother to say anything at all. He was still trying to figure out what had just happened, and most of all, _why_. 

Tommy hesitated for a moment, he still felt pretty stupid, but then decided to go in anyways. Adam poured Tommy a cup of coffee in silence, and then sat down at the kitchen island with him and Sauli. Adam couldn’t even talk at this point. He was so confused. Tommy nervously played around with the spoon in his cup. He didn’t really know what to say either. 

“Anyways,” Sauli then continued. “I just wanna say that Adam has been working on some amazing new tunes. Honestly, you should read what he’s done so far. The other album was good, but this… no really.” 

Tommy wanted to react, purely out of politeness, but he found his thoughts wandering off. Adam felt even more awkward as he noticed how Tommy was staring at him, waiting for him to say something. And however wrong it was, Adam actually couldn’t wait for Sauli to leave so he could yell at Tommy for making him feel this confused. As Sauli still waited for a reply from either of them, he stayed quiet. It was the most awkward of silences that both Adam and Tommy had ever encountered. 

A few more minutes of silent, awkward, coffee drinking went by, when Sauli suddenly got up on his feet. “Well, I’ll be off then,” He said as he leaned in to kiss Adam. He quickly turned his cheek and looked Tommy straight in the eye with a stern look. This caught Tommy off guard. Sauli cleared his throat as he recovered from the rejection, and then grabbed his coat. “Alright. Hope you two have a good time, babe. And it was nice to see you, Tommy.” 

Tommy merely gave Sauli a quick, nervous nod as he walked off. As they then heard the front door shut, Tommy and Adam got up at the exact same time. The way they both shot up, made their bodies press up against each other. The second Adam felt Tommy’s loud heartbeat on his chest; it brought him back to the tour. It brought him back to all of those nights on stage. From the time they started, to the time they regretfully stopped. Even the times they sometimes kissed off stage because they were either drunk or… _practicing_ , as they would call it. And suddenly, he felt a sort of euphoria as he looked into Tommy’s eyes again.

“I’m so sorry, Adam. I had no idea that you two had…-“ Tommy started nervously, but was cut off by something that he didn’t expect at all. By the time that he could process it, Adam’s hand had slipped behind Tommy’s neck and his lips were deeply locked with his. Adam wasn’t entirely sure why he did it, but he simply couldn’t help himself. 

This was crazy. This was insane. What was he doing, Adam asked himself as he was still kissing Tommy. Tommy on the other hand, wasn’t even thinking anymore. This was exactly what he wanted, what he had hoped for. 

But what he didn’t want or hoped for was what would happen next. Adam pulled away and covered his face with his hands. “What am I doing?” He mumbled, in a slight panicky voice. “What the fuck, am I doing?” He repeated. 

Tommy didn’t know what to say. He just wanted to hold him to let him know that it was okay. But was it, really? This was honestly as wrong as wrong could possibly get. 

Tommy gently caressed the back of Adam’s hand, which made him remove them from his face. As he looked back up at Tommy again, that same urge returned. The urge to kiss him, and perhaps be kissed back by him too. The urge to hold him and tell him that he…- No. He couldn’t possibly be… Could he? No, he had to fight this. 

Surely enough though, Adam’s lips locked with Tommy’s once more. He kissed him, and Tommy kissed him back. This time it was with much more passion than before. Though it scared both of them, it didn’t make them pull away. It made them want more. As time went by, the kiss became more intense. It went on to the point where Adam had lifted Tommy onto the table and firmly held onto his thighs as their tongues fought for dominance. 

_So much for yelling at him_ , Adam suddenly thought. 

Tommy then pulled away from Adam’s lips and started to kiss down his neck.

“Oh fuck, this is so wrong.” Adam muttered as he moaned slightly.

“But it... feels right... doesn’t it?” Tommy asked in between kisses. 

Adam groaned in agreement. It did feel right. And that was the wrong part. Tommy carefully slid Adam’s bathrobe off his shoulders and gently kissed him on his collarbone a few times. It sent chills down Adam’s spine. But however much Adam wanted to, he couldn’t let it go on.

“We have to stop. Please stop Tommy.” He whispered, almost whining. As Tommy backed away, Adam pulled his bathrobe back over his shoulders and sighed deeply. “This is wrong, Tommy. Fuck, I want you, but… I can’t. I can’t do this to Sauli. He doesn’t deserve this.” 

Tommy was hurt, but he had himself to blame. What else did he honestly expect? That he would just leave Sauli, go with him and never look back? Surely that is what he had hoped for, but the chances of that happening suddenly seemed to be very small. Adam looked Tommy in the eyes. It was hard for him to do this, but he had to. He had to stay true. He wanted to stay true. A person in an honest relationship didn’t do this kind of thing to their partner, it simply wasn’t right. “I want you to leave. I need to think. I need to be alone.” 

Tommy was disappointed, but he understood. He didn’t want to make this any harder for Adam than it already was. And without further words, he left. 

By the end of the day, Sauli returned from the photo shoot. Adam had already gone to bed. He was pretty exhausted from everything that had happened. And he had a serious problem; he could no longer get Tommy out of his head. And deep down he knew that there was more to this, but he didn’t want to admit to that just yet.

Sauli crawled into bed with Adam and started to kiss his neck on the exact place where Tommy had last been. But this didn’t turn him on. Not one bit. “Did you have a nice day today?” Sauli whispered as he slid a hand up Adam’s thigh. Adam pushed his hand away, but that didn’t stop him. Sauli simply slid his hand back up Adam’s leg and under his shirt. This time, Adam firmly grabbed Sauli’s hand and pushed it away with a loud, annoyed sigh. He really didn’t want Sauli to touch him. He didn’t feel like he deserved to be touched by a man as gentle and good to him as Sauli was.

“I’m not in the mood. Leave me alone.” Adam muttered, angrily. Though he was very much in the mood, he wasn’t in the mood for good boy Sauli. The only person Adam wanted to be kissed or touched by was Tommy, and no one else. The mere thought of Tommy had completely flooded Adam’s senses. He was all he could think about. And that really pissed him off.

“What is up with you?” Sauli asked in an annoyed tone. “I don’t know you like this,” Sauli honestly didn’t. Their relationship was generally pretty good as far as Sauli was concerned. They hadn’t been together for that long, but long enough. But with what happened that day, Adam wasn’t quite sure whether that would last much longer. 

And if he was planning on making it last, he had to tell Sauli about what had happened between him and Tommy. Sauli had every right to know, even though Adam knew it would hurt him badly. He didn’t mean to hurt him, he was a good guy, and he loved him. But the second Tommy’s lips touched Adam’s; it felt like he was dying just a little. He hadn’t fallen _out_ of love with Sauli, but he felt sick to his stomach thinking about being in this position with Tommy; living together, sleeping together… _Loving_ each other. Did this mean though, that he had fallen _in_ love with Tommy? No, that wasn’t possible. He couldn’t love two people at the same time.

Days, even a few weeks, went by without a word from Tommy. And in a way, Adam was relieved about that fact. It gave him time to forget about what had happened. But who was he kidding, really? He couldn’t forget about it. No matter how hard he tried. It was Tommy. He always had a special place in Adam’s heart. But he had given up on hoping it would ever become more than that the day that Tommy had told Adam that he was straight.

“Hey, look, baby! One of your concerts is on TV.” Sauli announced in his usual excited tone. Adam was sitting at the table, blankly staring out into nothing. “Baby, do you want to come and watch?” Sauli then asked.

“No thanks, Tommy.” Adam replied without thinking.

Sauli walked into the kitchen with a slightly confused feeling. “Did you just call me Tommy?” He asked, slightly amused. He looked down at Adam and noticed his white face and his tired eyes. “Baby, you have been stirring that cup for like 20 minutes. What’s up with you these days? It’s like you’re not here.” 

It was then that Adam snapped back to reality. He looked down at his cup and somehow he imagined Tommy’s face in the reflection of his coffee. He quickly covered it with his hand and shoved it away. _Pathetic_.

“I’m sorry,” Adam whispered as he looked up at Sauli. He tried to smile as sincerely as he could, but it wasn’t very convincing. “I guess I’m just not used to doing nothing anymore.” He excused himself. 

“Baby, you are such a workaholic. You need to take some serious time off. Go to a spa for a few days or something. Wait, yes! We could totally do that together, maybe this weekend even.” Sauli’s eyes were sparkling with excitement. 

Adam sighed and got up to pour his now cold coffee down the drain. “I can’t,” He muttered softly. “I’ve scheduled to head into the studio. Besides I haven’t seen my mom in a while, I should visit. She needs me.” The simple fact was, that Adam didn’t want to be anywhere else than in the studio. It was the only place where he was distracted from his thoughts. It was the only place where he wouldn’t even get the time to think about Tommy or anything else for a single second. 

Sauli then walked up behind Adam and wrapped his arms around his waist. “Not as much as I need you here,” He gently whispered into Adam’s ear. Adam looked back over his shoulder, expecting to see Sauli. But instead he saw Tommy’s beautiful smile, followed by his piercing brown eyes and his shiny blonde hair. Adam then violently shook his head and wrung himself out of Sauli’s arms. He wondered whether he had completely gone mad. Everywhere he looked and with whatever he did, Tommy kept popping up in his mind. It was ridiculous. 

“I’ll see what I can do about the studio,” Adam assured Sauli as he put on his coat and got ready to leave. The truth was though, that he wasn’t going to do anything about it. If he were going to do anything at all, it would be to make sure that his days were fully planned. Adam didn’t want to give himself more than a minute of rest. 

With Tommy’s busy schedule of only god knows what, it wasn’t so hard to keep his mind off Adam. Or so he thought, anyways. After having struggled with his feelings and sexuality for the longest time now, Tommy’s feelings for Adam had surely made him doubt his so called straightness all over. 

Maybe he simply hadn’t met the right woman yet to show him that? “These are going to be some awesome shots, conyo!” Cris said.

Tommy’s photo shoot with his photographer friend was going pretty well. Tommy had hoped that Adam would’ve at least called him by now or something. But he figured that he had planned other things to avoid having to see Tommy

After the photo shoot, Tommy and Cris went off to have a drink. He figured it would be a good time to talk to him and possibly ask for advice. They were pretty good friends after all. “Two beers. Thanks,” Cris said to the waitress. He then turned to Tommy and gave him a slap on his leg. “So, do tell, what is going on in the amazing life of the great Tommy Joe Ratliff.” He said, in his usual utterly sarcastic tone.

Tommy chuckled shyly and scratched the back of his head. “Would you believe me if I told you that I was a complete wreck?” He asked, trying not to sound too serious.

Cris raised an eyebrow and then snorted. “You? A complete wreck?” All Tommy did was look away and nod. Complete wreck was perhaps a bit over the top, but he _was_ a wreck. Cris wasn’t sure what was going on, so he just asked away, hoping he would just tell him. “Is the fame getting too much for little TJR?” He asked in a mocking tone. Tommy simply shook his head. “Well, tell me!” Cris then demanded.

“I’m in love, I think.” Tommy finally admitted. 

Cris started grinning like a child on Christmas morning. “Who is she? That hot dark haired chick you met last month?” He yelped as he teasingly nudged Tommy’s arm. The waitress came by with the beers, which gave Tommy time to prepare himself for Cris’ next reaction.

Tommy took a deep breath and sighed. “It’s… it’s a he, actually,” Cris fell silent. He was completely caught off guard by this statement. The silence worried Tommy, so he carefully looked up to see the look on his face. As soon as Cris realized that Tommy was serious, his jaw dropped. “But, you know, it doesn’t matter,” Tommy then quickly muttered, trying to steer the conversation in another direction. He grabbed his beer bottle and nervously fumbled around with it, letting his thumb make popping noises from the neck of the bottle. At this point he started to wonder whether he should’ve told anyone at all.

“Oh but it does,” Cris simply stated. “I mean, like, are you sure that you’re in love with... a guy? Like, really _in love_? With who anyways?” Cris was obviously confused. 

Tommy forcefully slammed his beer bottle back into the bar. “ _Fuck_! It's Adam, okay? Man, I knew you’d react like this!” He blurted out, slightly annoyed. “Did you miss the part where I said, _I think_?” Tommy was so confused about the whole thing himself that any reaction honestly made him more frustrated. 

“Yeah but… Like, did you have sex with this guy?” Cris then asked. He wasn’t entirely sure why he asked him this, but he thought it was perhaps a mere phase. I mean, this wouldn’t be the first time that Tommy was attracted to a guy. Adam of all guys was no surprise. But _love_?

Tommy was stumped at the blunt question. “Well…” He had to think about this one for a second. “No… I mean, well, no. Just, no.” 

Cris almost choked on his beer. “Why did that not sound convincing at all?” 

“Well,” Tommy started again. “Something might have happened during the tour, that one night in Amsterdam. I don’t exactly remember but… you know… certain things kind of pointed to the obvious.” Cris already knew exactly what he meant by now. He had heard this story before. “You must think that I’m a complete idiot,” Tommy added in a mutter. But that’s not what Cris thought at all. 

“It pretty much makes sense now, I guess.” Cris said as she had sort of an epiphany. Tommy looked at him, wondering what the hell he even meant. “You’ve been in love with him all this time, haven’t you?” What he said did make sense, but it took some time before Tommy realized it. “So tell me one thing though,” Cris then continued. Tommy looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. “If you love him, why aren’t you two together?” 

Tommy sighed deeply. “It’s complicated,” He muttered. It wasn’t complicated at all, but he just didn’t want to admit to the fact that he was in love with someone that was already taken. By a pretty good one even, or so Tommy thought. It made him feel pathetic.

Later that day, it suddenly started to rain and storm heavily. That was Tommy’s queue to head homeward. Though Cris was pretty supportive on the whole situation, it didn’t really matter much since Adam already had a boyfriend anyways. Tommy said goodbye to Cris, hopped into his car, and took the back roads to the house.

As Tommy drove through the hills, he spotted a car with the hood opened up and someone leaning into it. He decided to stop beside the car and rolled down his window. Who the Hell would be out here in this weather, he wondered. “Hey, do you need some help?” He asked politely. The winds were howling through the trees and the rain was pouring down like Niagara falls. It was insane.

“If I need help going missing and winding up dead or worse, I’ll just move to Santa Carla, thanks,” Tommy chuckled a little at that reply. He instantly noticed the Lost Boys reference. He was merely trying to be nice, though. 

“How about a ride?” Tommy then asked. “This storm is going to get worse,” The guy then stood up and turned towards Tommy’s car. To his great surprise, it was Adam. How did he not notice that? Or even recognize the car for that mater? Yet quite frankly, Adam was just as shocked as Tommy was. Out of the thousands of people that lived in LA, why did it have to be him? But honestly Adam liked it just as much as he hated the fact that it was Tommy. 

Without even thinking, Tommy got out of his car and hopped over to Adam. Adam simply laughed at him. “Are you crazy?” He asked, surprised. “It’s pouring! Get back into your car and go home,” He basically demanded. Yet somehow, he felt relieved.

Tommy laughed and took off his jacket. “You can’t tell me what to do,” He said in a playful tone as he threw his jacket over Adam’s head and shoulders. Tommy looked down at Adam and immediately their eyes were locked. The rain was getting worse and worse. And soon enough, they were both drowned wet. 

“My car broke down,” Adam stated the obvious. Why else would he be out there?

Tommy laughed and gently moved a lock of wet hair out of Adam’s face. “I noticed. Come on, I don’t want you to get sick.” He gestured for Adam to get into his car, and so he did. After only a minute or two of driving, Tommy stopped and parked his car in a driveway.

“Since when do you live here?” Adam noticed, slightly confused.

“I don’t. I’m just housesitting a friend’s place. Plus, I got sick of my flat mate, so I’ve just been crashing here.” Tommy explained in a blank mutter. “Ignore the mess. I wasn’t expecting company,” Adam rolled his eyes at Tommy and walked into the house. But the so-called mess that he mentioned was nowhere to be found. Tommy went into the bathroom for a moment, and came back out with two towels. “Here,” he said as he handed Adam one of them.

Adam smiled and dried his hair a little. As Tommy took off his shirt, Adam took Tommy’s jacket off him and threw it aside. “Can you unzip me?” Adam then asked as he turned his back towards Tommy. Tommy was surprised at what Adam just asked him to do. But without thinking too much about it, he did it anyways. “Sutan put me into some weird outfit, and I seriously wasn’t able to get it off on my own. Thank you.” As Adam then off what seemed like sort of a onesie, Tommy quickly turned around. “Like you’ve never seen this before,” Adam pointed out as he giggled. 

Tommy then turned back around and looked at Adam, to find that he was only inches away from him. Tommy instantly turned to stone. To him, Adam was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. And here they were again; more or less in the same position as they were every night on stage. Minus the crowd and the performance pressure. No, wait, there was definitely performance pressure. 

The memory flashed by before both of their eyes. And without realizing it, Tommy and Adam slowly grew closer to each other, until their lips met once more. Tommy gently cupped Adam’s face in his hands, praying that he wouldn’t pull away again. Adam didn’t want to stop himself any longer. This was what he wanted. Adam ran his fingers through Tommy’s hair as their kiss deepened. Hearing the heavy rain on the windows and the rooftop made it all the more perfect. Tommy slowly started to move towards where the bed was. The way that he walked made Adam carefully go backwards. As Tommy undid his belt and slipped off his pants, their lips never left each other. Tommy pushed his hand into the arch of Adam’s back, to gently lay him down on the bed. He then crawled in as well and leaned over Adam to look into his eyes, in search for any doubt at all. But there was no doubt. There was no hesitation. Adam knew that this was exactly what he wanted. He gently stroke Tommy’s cheek and then kissed him again. Their tongues danced around in each other’s mouths. Tommy’s hand then slowly slipped up Adam’s thigh, all the way up to the rim of his boxers. Until he stopped, just like that. It was the exact moment that Tommy realized that despite the things that might have happened in the past, he didn’t exactly know how to have sex with a man. 

Adam then suddenly pulled away from the kiss. “Stop worrying,” He whispered softly into Tommy’s ear. "You'll be fine." The tone of Adam’s voice sent chills down Tommy’s spine. Adam gently kissed Tommy’s neck and then started to nibble on it. It immediately took Tommy’s mind off everything. He took off Adam’s boxers, and after that, his own briefs too. Tommy then softly started to caress Adam’s half hard dick, which made him tremble in delight. Adam wrapped his arms around Tommy’s neck and kissed him again. This time, it was a fierce kiss. It was a kiss that demanded more.

Tommy then positioned himself between Adam’s legs, prepped himself as he forced Adam’s hips upward, and slowly slid himself inside of Adam. Adam moaned softly into Tommy’s mouth as he felt him go all the way in. This was it; there was no going back now. Tommy started to thrust slowly, enjoying the mere sensation of being inside of Adam. Adam ran his fingers through Tommy’s soft, wet hair and bit his lip. This turned him on even more. He then started to thrust harder, which resulted in both of them moaning in pleasure. Tommy didn’t expect that it would feel this good. And quite frankly, for Adam it was exactly the same. Usually he’d be the one on top, the dominant one. But with Tommy he didn’t mind being vulnerable. 

Tommy kept on thrusting, grinding his body down onto Adam’s. It made him go absolutely crazy. Soon enough, the intensity had both of them reach their peeks. Tommy let out a loud final moan and collapsed down beside Adam. He was simply stunned at how amazing it felt. And how satisfying it was to finally get what he had wanted for so long. 

Tommy then turned towards Adam and gently caressed his cheek. Adam smiled at him for a moment, but that smile then quickly faded. 

“I’m gonna take a shower,” Adam whispered with a thoughtful look on his face. Tommy immediately noticed the change in his mood. He merely nodded and pulled his hand back. He was really worried at this point that Adam did regret what they had just done. 

Adam got out of bed and hopped into the bathroom. He looked into the mirror for a moment, and then started to cry a little. But he wasn’t crying from sadness. No, he was crying because he finally realized what was going on. 

Adam then turned on the shower, and let the hot water rinse his body. No one would ever see his tears. No matter if they were happy or sad ones. He simply didn’t want that. After some time, the door of the bathroom opened. Tommy stepped in and looked at Adam. He was determined to make sure that he was okay. That _they_ were okay. 

Adam then looked back at Tommy, completely emotionless, as he wondered what his intentions were. Tommy then hastily went over to Adam, as if a magnet was pulling him in. He gently wiped away the run out mascara on Adam’s cheek, and stared deep into his eyes. Tommy wanted to tell him so badly how he felt, but the fear that it would scare him away held him back. But Adam wasn’t scared anymore. He knew now that this was it. He knew that he could no longer go home and live happily with Sauli. He simply couldn’t. This was where he belonged, and he had to let Tommy know that, right then and there. Adam looked away for a moment and then back at Tommy.

“I love you,” He whispered. And he meant it, with every beat of his heart. 

Tommy was completely caught off guard by what Adam had just told him. It left him speechless. Adam then smiled just a little and kissed him deeply as he noticed the shock on Tommy’s face. 

The next morning, Tommy had woken up quite early. It took him a few minutes before he realized that what had happened the evening before was not just a dream. He looked beside him and smiled. Adam was still sound asleep, with sort of a satisfied smile on his face. And however creepy it may have been, Tommy would just lie there and stare at Adam until he would wake up. It was the most perfect sight he could imagine. Surely enough, after a little while had gone by, Adam opened his eyes. He looked straight at Tommy, when suddenly his facial expression turned into pure horror. “Oh fuck!” He exclaimed as he shot up.

“What?” Tommy asked in a worried tone.

“What day is it?” Adam asked as he grabbed the covers and hopped out of bed.

Tommy chuckled. “It’s Sunday,” He stated. “Get your ass back over here,” Adam raised an eyebrow and looked back at Tommy. It was only then that Tommy realized what he had just said. “I’m sorry, please come back to me.” He then said as he laughed. He felt like such an idiot for saying that.

It was a weird feeling, but Adam felt so comfortable around Tommy. He could say just about anything, and he wouldn’t mind at all. Adam then crawled back into bed with Tommy and put his head on his chest. Strangely enough, it felt normal, and not awkward at all. 

Tommy gently wrapped an arm around Adam and let out a sigh. “How did we never do this any sooner?” Adam then decided to ask.

Tommy thought about it for a moment. “It was my fault.” He confessed.

“Your fault?” Adam repeated.

“Yeah,” Tommy started. “Kissing you on stage confused the heck out of me, man. It made me doubt who I was entirely. You made me… _feel_ things I had never felt before… for a man, anyways. You tend to do that a lot, you know?”

Adam looked up at Tommy and laughed a little. “Guilty.” He admitted.

Tommy chuckled. “You’re such an ass. And now…-“ His voice turned serious. “Now you have a boyfriend, and I am the ass. Because I made you cheat on him.”

“Hey, don’t say that.” Adam put a finger under Tommy’s chin and made him look Adam in the eye. “I am to blame here, because I didn’t say no. I let it happen, and I wanted it to. Now I’ve got to face the consequences.” Adam really didn’t feel good, knowing how much he was going to hurt Sauli. _He_ was the ass here. 

“I _am_ an ass. I could’ve come to you and told you how I felt months ago! But I didn’t, did I? No, I waited until you had a fucking boyfriend. Like what the hell?” Tommy was slowly starting to freak out. It was exactly what had been going through his mind for ages now.

“Months?” Adam exclaimed, completely surprised about that little fact.

“Yeah… it’s been a few months since I… well, you know.”

Adam was utterly shocked, and also disappointed. “Oh my god… Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Tommy simply started laughing. At the time he wasn’t very happy about it. He lived his life thinking he was straight, until Adam strutted into his life. At the time, Tommy thought it was ridiculous that there could be something more between him and Adam. Sure, he admitted that he had a fascination for men already, but never did it even cross his mind that he could fall in love with one. Yet, he did. He was really, really sure of that now. 

And for a while, everything was perfect. Until the moment that the hardest part of all would arise: telling Sauli. Breaking his heart. There was nothing Adam could possibly do or say that wouldn’t result in hurting Sauli. And that was the ugly truth of it all. But eventually Sauli would find happiness again, he was sure of that. He would end up with someone that did deserve his sweet and gentle nature. Like Adam and Tommy deserved each other. With all their perfect imperfections.


End file.
